More thoughts

So many thoughts jumbling through my head... I just said yes to a request to watch Barbie and the 12 Dancing Princesses (where is an eye rolling icon when I need it?), and have come off a stressful hour of trying to get two cranky kids under 3 to settle down for naps (one successful, one not), so I'm taking a "work breather" to sort out my thoughts/feelings...

After observing my children this week I'm realizing just how much these children are educated by their intimacies, and how some good "strewing" will be beneficial right now. They seem to be in a rut, and restless. They are doing many of the things they always enjoyed that can be called "educational" - listening to audiobooks of the American Girls series, dressing up like the characters, listening to the Sound of Music and singing the songs (it's a sad state this world is in when 4 children singing "Do, Re, Mi" in a library parking lot to their baby brother can bring stares of disdain, but I digress). They are arguing a lot again, however, and they seem restless. I can tell many of the great things they have been educated by are making thier mark, in a good way, but feel it's time to move on.

Which brings me to my first hurdle - What next? Well, we'll definitely be doing some gardening, but dh needs to build the raised bed and I need to get out to buy supplies for some more seedling-starting. And I'm blank! The girls don't have ideas right now either. Maybe it's just a time to wait and see what interests pop up, but I'm trying hard to be PROACTIVE and set the stage. My brain is fried from lack of sleep and sustinance though (I typically hit a bad energy slump around 6-9 months postpartum as my growing baby plus severe allergy diet catches up with me).

I liked this article on control and this one on obedience but I'm having trouble merging these with what I'm believing about the benefits of unschooling.

I feel that the one thing that is lacking the most here is a mom (who, me? LOL) who can *lovingly* lead the children through the routines and learning of the day. I'm either leading, or I'm being loving. We all (me especially) seem to *need* a very routinized day, but the children all BALK at it and I'm left prodding, which causes 2 of my children to set their heels in deep and fight me, which honestly "wastes" so much time in a day that we are OFF the routine before we ever really got into it? Now, I don't want to give the impression that we are just willy-nilly here all day, we DO eat at regular times, etc, but one day the kids might eat breakfast then do daily self care stuff then play then do math - the next day they play, then eat, then play some more, then do their self care (only if I tell them to), then it's already time for lunch, LOL. Add in a baby who is only now at 6 months semi-approximating any sort of sleep routine, and an almost 3yo who is either fighting me or dh or fighting naps or fighting her sisters, and I just CAN'T imagine how I could get us into a daily routine. So we continue to flounder, I continue to get antsy about it, and beg and plead God for some insight. Oh well, in time I guess!

Here's another thing I'm wondering (gosh, this will also sound like complaining, but really I'm just thinking out loud about how to make things work with what I've got - bloom where I'm planted and all, LOL) - how to *strew* well in a small home where things are often "out" due to lack of good storage, children's rooms that look like a clutter factory exploded, and babies/toddlers that like to "get into" stuff. I hear things like, "I put the book on her nighttable" and I think things like, "We have 3 girls in an 9x11 room, who has room for a nighttable??" and "If I put something on Rose's bookcase headboard she'd never even notice it with all the clutter she keeps there no matter how often we suggest she straighten up". I know if God wants me to do this there has to be some answer, but I'm not finding it right now. I guess as I get a little more time with the littles getting older, I can rearrange our storage to better serve our needs, leaving vertical surfaces freer for strewing. Or, as I constantly joke with dh, "We could just MOVE!" :)

I have not made the jump to unschooling math yet, because after years of searching, we have finally encountered a math program that doesn't make my oldest cry (Right Start) so I'm just going to go with that for now.

I want to sit down with the girls in a sort of family meeting to talk about their interests and goals. I'm not sure Skye (8) is interested in goals -she really just likes to be told exacly WHAT to do and HOW to do it - but Rose (10) is very free spirited and would enjoy making some goals and giving input on how she would like to reach them. Again, not sure how to present this to them. I sure wish I was a fly on the wall in other relaxed school/unschoolers' homes.

I'd better go - I'm feeling better and have many things I could do before the baby wakes up!